I love riding my bike around the neighborhood. It’s like being able to drive again (except probably much more dangerous, for both safety and health reasons). It cuts down on time spent waiting for buses, time spent walking and, most importantly, time spent being angry at stupid traffic. God, traffic is stupid in China.*

Cycling does not always go smoothly, though. I’ve already run into someone (on a scooter), and almost run over several pedestrians, not to mention almost had a car run into me. These are all things I assumed would happen before getting a bike. But bike riding in China is all about knowing the dangers of a lawless road filled with vehicles of all varieties (shiny black Audis, giant accordion buses, giant coach buses, mian bao ches, three-wheelers hauling loads three times the size of the bike itself, rickshaws, motorbikes, scooters, the occasional donkey-pulled cart), plus wayward pedestrians who have a very loose grasp on their lives — and still riding your bike anyway. All of these people and drivers are liable to pull into your path at any given moment without notice and without them noticing you. The trick to riding safely really isn’t to be noticeable, but to have rapid reflexes. I tried to observe whether there were possible rules of the road, but I quickly determined there are none. Go when and where you can go, and don’t put yourself in someone else’s way (although, often they are in your way. Brats). Relax, enjoy the pandemonium, take comfort in knowing that you saved both time and money, and breathe in some delicious Beijing pollution.**

It also helps to be complimented on your bike. I’m fully aware my bright pink (Barbie, according to some) bike is not to everyone’s tastes. However, the other day as I was getting my bike after work, one excellent middle-aged Chinese man made known to me his admiration for my bike. “That’s a nice bike you have,” he said in Chinese, along with other things that were along the same lines. I beamed all the way home.

*Seriously stupid. For example, at the main intersection of the road my apartment building is on and the road my office building is on, the right turn signal is green when the oncoming traffic light is green. I have been able to explain a lot of other stupid rules, but this one is still a mystery to me.

**According to the Beijinger, the polluted air could be making people fat. Between that and the fact that the air here is like smoking one-sixth of a cigarette a day, the health reasons for riding bicycles, while true elsewhere, may be entirely invalid in Beijing.